I was boarding this bus in the morning after lesson, then i started to saw this really old couple, the wife was in a wheelchair while her husband was still okay. He armed her up to the bus then ensure she has a seat before moving back carry the wheel chair up and keep it aside. I noticed like practically the whole bus passengers were staring at the old couple, of cos i was also..I can tell from the elder man knew they were all glaring at his wife's leg or something but surprisly, he was still smiling and talking to his wife like his eyes has the sight of his wife only. i feel this unconditional love is so unfathomable, i really admired dem, they are so loving. im thinking would i do it if i were him? Perhaps i would, but no one can be certain about future. I could loudly say now i will definitely do the same thing like the elder man for my parents or my wife 40, 50 years down the road. say is easy, but doing is difficult, i am not very sure if i have the courage to embrace others' glare or the lurfee is strong enuff for me to do anything for them. definitely i would do it but the question is will i really do it from the bottom of my heart? will i ever get sick of doing? all these uncertaintly makes me lose confidence on myself . hmm if only lives aren't so complex and we can know ahead of our future, perhaps we could do things now to change.
I had two drivings lesson this week and it went pretty smoothly. No longer as panic as i was and best no more scoldings hehe. My next lesson will be at oct 30, ahhhh forgot to book for oct. sian. after my yest driving lesson, met up with my sister and dad for some furnture shopping and then to north point had dinner. i wanted to had sushi at sakae but it was like damm super long queue so in the end had dinner at manhatten fish market. haha i ordered fish n chips. shldnt order fried, too full felt like puking. shld have learnt from adrian order grilled. my sis imba ordered the whole fish LOL! then i dug the fish eyes and eat..*sparks* lol then we saw the fish mouth inside got its tongue like doing *pouts* like this. freaking funny. haha then my dad as usual wans sth to do with rice so we ordered flaming platter for him. haha it was lame to see dem fighting to pay bill..like so chinese haha..i doubt westerners do that..and i din noe passion card got 10% discount..omg..haha luckily i got..and got free $10 vouchers using dbs..woo like alot but the gst and svs charger is imba shit. anyway then we went to popular shop for stationary as im intending to start writing diary..:D den my sis bought a cooking book -.- lol i told her to cook vege as i wan to start eating it..part of my diet plan :D. den went home..officially moving hse : next sat! WOOO..SUGOI!
heh heh! :D
12:22 PM
What a green week it is! I'm still not convinced that i myself have changed and how am i be able to convince others then? Perhaps i need to put a greater restrain on my mind and body. They should never be coordinated and be cohesive. Its always the case of easier said than done so nothing could prove i've changed till i convince myself with actions :)
this week has been a tough week because of numerous trainings and outfields. i realise conflicts and misunderstandings are easily arise during trainings because we dont really function as one. i was enlightened and come to realisation after what PS Ivan mentioned to me..he was telling me why do i always complain xxx but yet i seem so close to him in camp? Ah this is why onlookers always see situations better than those are involved. i realised i am just blaming others for this whole load shyt of unfairness and troubles they had brought to me but never thought of perhaps i dun really mind doing and its neither their choices. what he said was so true. honestly i have so much more reasons to like than dislike him. ultimately, i want to ord happily, not making any enemies or cause any unhappiness memories to them or myself. i guess its just parts and parcel of outfield to complains and whinges but back to camp, we're still friends, no hard feelings right? this is what i need to practise, to appreciate them more at outfield. haha also thinking back i was being REALLY petty and mean on the appraisals. i muz admit i wrote that out of pit of anger and i should be more fair to them. definitely each of them have so much things for me to appreciate than dislike. i am sorry for being foolish.
i feel each book in is getting draggy because this last leg of my army race is coming to an end yet its the hardest path i have to cross before reaching the finishing line. i try not to think if i could do it because no matter what i still have to do it haha..im juz hoping atec ends soon because it is what causes conflicts, misunderstandings, hatred, biasness to everyone. i have so much faith that we will be so happy without atec and stay so cohesive. :D Just some thoughts on this platoon.
woo finally get to catch the movie devil..haha horror movie ahh..but the ending was lame..so i'd rate it a 2.5/5 lol 5th driving lesson tmr + moving hse. Fighting! =)
10:36 PM
Today had my 4th driving lesson and it's getting really really bad. Honestly, there are so many things to do when driving, check blind spot, signal, cancel signal, look mirror, change gear, clutch, accelerator..ahhh no wonder ppl say >>ure driving me crazy.. driving can get really crazy. today morning i learnt gear shifting 1>2>3>4 and backwards..The guy saw me having PDL and suggested to learn outside which i was told in the previous lesson 1>2>3 is done in the circuit first. I was really nervous man like first time drive outside the real traffic and have no idea how to change gear. He demostrated once to me and told me ppl usually took 2-3 to clear this gear shifting and its all up to me..I tell you..this guy really fcked me badly..i practically kena scolded by him for the first 40 mins until i got the hand of changing gear. at first i was really freak out din look at mirror and signal, forgot cancel signal..reluctant to change gear cos need to change down when turning and 1 when completely stop..he like this road belongs to ur father ah no need look at mirror? zz and he told me if im afraid to change gear i will never learn to..so i like fuck it la den jzu change..and i really got the hand of it for the next 60 mins haha and he decided to clear me in one lesson :D YAY. im afraid i will forget the coordination during the next lesson..ahhhh..toot army lol
im totally in lurfee with this song lucky by jason mraz and colbie callibat..really gd :) meaningful song and if you do know any songs that are nice can intro to me :). go listen man :D and cn blue roz!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D
5:03 PM
Had my 3rd lesson today and guess who i saw..gee suan. JC classmates and havent seen him for like ever since we slavery ourselves.. Had like 10 mins talk then proceed to driving. My instructor today was like screwed up..like getting from good to bad.. He lays his conditions at the start and demostrate once to me and i had to meet all of the requirments otherwise he would not chalk for me. ZzZ..I was like thinking my $68 cannot go to waste lol..Fighting fighting..haha..so like force myself to be focused..I think what he mentioned to me were quite true. he said i should not like learn only on the weekend otherwise 1 week gap like you tend to forget some little details, should be continous..i wish also right but i cannot la..im a slave remb..anyway oct i only got 1 lesson cos im probably going for a surgey to remove 2 corns on my sole. kinda pain when i drive today..ah darn! FML! Tmr's fourth lesson.. FIGHTING!!
Anyway..i din go out to outfield this week but im like miss out alot of funs..seriously, i duno whats wrong wif me..i used to hate outfield but now like i dun mind haha..not addicted juz like go den go lo..perhaps my perspective has changed.. its good..show that im changing (: in camp was super boring as most pltn mates moved out so like play monopoly, risk, eat, sleep, watch show, read book..lifeless? no!! its what we called the ord-life which i will exp soon after jan (: ord lo! haha
ah seriously..i made an online application for passport yesterday and i tink high chance photo kena rejected...i din read the requirments needed..gonna take one proper one tmr :D man..hopefully its done soon so at least i feel settle down and some spur of motivation from my ord trip!! pure cool ness and highly excited + looking forward..!! sugoi!!!!!!
wanted learn korean wif my very on fren freddy but after seeing the price (demand>supply) which results in high price..sian la..need reconsider and choose wisely..why is everything related to money lol..im planning to take jap also maybe in nus..im very glad i din change to ntu civil enginering after seein the newly rating of ntu..but i doubt its a gd indicator.
moving hse next week..bedless.. :D cool ness i remb when i was young i lurfee sleeping on floor cos its so cooling..
suddenly have a thought..why 2 years? isnt it way too long? what would i be now if i din serve and quit sch for a year? so many regrets and unlimited wants yet i cant do anything for my own life...aren't our fate decided by ourselves, at least to a certain extent? perhaps i could have more time for other thing if i finish studying earlier..or using this 2 years accomplishing some dreams..man..i feel like im no longer have the ability to control my life and i juz have to live with the flow.. =(
AHHHH!!!!
9:57 PM
I AM HATING THIS! WHY DIN MY PAGER SOUND??
I cancelled my driving lesson for this shit and seriously if its gonna be next weekend i'd be so
upset...
Anyway, i am starting to eat healthy foods..less oily and fried foods, more fruits but vege see
how :P hahaha... I started my diet plan 2 days ago. My ideal weight is to ~56kg. Fighting!
Did i mention yesterday i was being curious when i were at hg mall and saw a large crowd
outside so i walked up and joined in. To my horror..its Abigail Chay Singing..ZzzZ I mean like,
what were the crowd thinking? why cant HE juz be HIMSELF..i guess i'll nv understand because
i cannot put myself into HIS situation. I refuse to call HIM her. HUMPH ! *Pouts*
Ah Hooked into CNBlue's songs...haha really good considered they wrote the lyrics juz like Ayu
Chan (: Gonna explore Kpop more !
5 weeks straight of outfields..actually somehow i am used to it haha and my sole like grow 2
corns or wadeva it is spelled as.. my fren keep joking go remove den sell it.. wth -.- sadistics
can..hahaha
FML!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2:35 PM
