I am starting to doubt the existence of true friendship such as people calling each other BFF or hes my best fren. What qualities does a 'best' fren constitues of? I do believe there are friends around, but not to the extent of calling them best or true frens anymore because it appears to be so silly as i grew up. you will never know ur fren might be chatting wif u and at the next moment backstabbing especially those that aren't innocent afterall. It's scary people can hide their true colours infront of others but i don't blame them at all because this is how we came about, evolution right? survival of the fittest, to survive we have to pretend to be nice and act innocently but doing many things behind others. I have this insane thought that frens are no longer impt as u get older because we're no longer pure like we used to be. So i'm starting to keep a distance from people because i am afraid i might juz be another victim, worse, die unknowingly or cry over why would he do that to me..

if you were to ask me a year ago, i'd tell you i rather be the one get hurt than to hurt others...seems like i am the one changed so i am sorry if i don't seem like myself anymore ):


people should juz stop looking things at the surface, its so darn unfair!

sigh..i need a break from this place.

2:44 PM

Booked in on saturday night was definitely emo-ish T-T haha.. It's like, freak what da heck am i doing in camp on a sat night! Book in was emo enuff and the worse part is seeing the camp being soul-less and the quietness was enuff to bored u to death zZz. So i booked in and like was fuck 4th floor blackout AGAIN. it's like a weekly routine le damm..so the smart me was trying to fix it cos i remb it was purely turning the switch clockwise den ZZzZzZzZZzZzZ..ITS LIKE REALLY ZZZZZ..electric shock lol from my finger tips to elbow..the feeling like shiok hahaha..lol quite fun la :P but i still young dun wan die..so wore a glove and try it again but to no avail den the cos suggested me sleep in rep room hehe..aircon rm offer why not :) so i went to 3rd floor bathe like den went back to 4th floor freaking scary the whole corridor was like darkness..and i broke my mac glass! ahhh..had a hard time cleaning out den realized i could use esmunde's study latern LOL which he complained to me today no wonder no more batt ROFL..so went to rep rm watch tv wif sgt qx den slp den start of my 3rd weekend duty..

this duty makes me realize i could stand there for hrs day dreaming..thinking of lotta stuffs :) i've gd imaginations..like einstein says knowledge has limits but imagination is borderless.. kelvstein.. x) hahaha lame.. anyway.. freaking sian lo, hope no more weekend duty le if not ZZzZ,..IF NOT...ok i still muz do,, no choice ): hahah

anyway had my guard rest till like 11+ instant KO after having noodle and tok to esmunde..hes the only guy in camp hahahaha..den he left for lunch and i went off for my first yog ushering at a sec sch at north of sg :) reached the sch wif herman ahhaha..we both wanna taste the cheap food in sec sch but almost all closed le haha so too bad den waited for the students n chers to come..lol how to say..it was very chaotic la..but was better than wat i tot..not really ah beng sch :) haha they were friendly and funny..they intro themselves to me and ask for my names lol..so practically my job was their nanny..get food, serve them, ensure their attendance and transport, get them to their performing area, ans to their whinning and requests..haish -.- the teachers were quite friendly.. 1 guy called kelvin lim haha the other is indian female cher..veri nice to us and students :) the students were like imitating her indian accent when she speaks eng but she juz laff ba haha..she den came to greet us from far in the rain after we sent them back to sch and say appreciate us very much and thank you god bless us..my fren replied god bless u too which i tink is the weirdest way of reply ever when he wasnt a christian to start with -.- so it was like damm near my hse with the help of circle line ..half an hr reach le :) oh yes the sec 3 kids hor keep calling me uncle..i was like u calling me ah? ZZzZZ I GT SO OLD MEH lol my sis also haven had kid..hey im still boi boi la XD lol

my sis like wth cleared the whole damm room and i haven started. really..this weekend need to start cleaning up but i got damm lots of things to do..geez.. :) ok i will improve my ushering tmr..shout louder and be more like a nanny :) nightz xD

10:56 PM

ahhh..why do i get myself sick at this time! down with slight fever, sore throat, flu and cough. the worst of all is sore throat, its killing me no matter how many lozenges i've taken. i will let my body do the miracle, hopefully i could survive the duty T_T Had a sleepless night, awaken countless by the dry throat and flu ZZz ..

Often i wondered how can somebody be so foolish and don know when to stop talking when obviously others are irritated? or they know yet dey think its funny? i've learnt a lesson this week, never get too close to people you know their presence wont make any difference in ur life, because they tend to think dey 're close to you and take advantages of you. if you know im referring to you, juz stop it before im fed up. :)

Gotta attend a friend's birthday later, feeling damm lethargic, hpefully i wont dampen the atmosphere. :)

12:33 PM

I really duno what has happened to my body mechanism; i am a really light sleeper, could be awaken by the tiniest disturbance or noises so once its really hard for me to fall asleep unless im really tired. But the thing is, its getting worse, i could feel the jadishness in me but i just cant fall asleep until like 2am and woke up like in between. zZz This is screwed up! It's like i'm suffering from insomnia ahhhh...i need to shag myself out even more, which i've been granted the chance to protect the camp on this upcoming sunday.. hehe hopefully i could fall asleep after the 24 hrs of shagness. YEP :D

YOG is feverish now in Sg and probably across the globe. (: It's on newspaper every day, not only updating its sports also others news like food poisoning lol -.- But nevertheless, i believe SG have done pretty good so far, with 1 silver and 2 bronze..its like its really SGREAN sportmen :) haha.. Yep..and sad to say im doing for closing and i am no longer doing gate anymore - meaning i cannot view the live performance of closing ceremony. heh.. too bad eh..but i was already lucky enuff to watch the grand opening live which honestly is much much way better than the one telecasted on TV. hahaha!! YEP so now im an usher for the performers aka the nannies :P oh yep!! im shy tot so please open up to me instead of me to u .. :D Hahaha.. Next week is scheduled for yog and yay long weekends till monday.. cool ness. i gonna get my furnitures and do some shoppings and of cos spendin time with my dog. :)

gosh, i have been procrastinating with my studying..i've tots of learning and practising my engineering math before next year august since it is so vital to my course. anyway my aunt checked it up for my at nus library and that the engineering math text they are using are only for reference. damm! so like im gonna get my ass down to nlb to get myself some printed materials from reference book which i found online its pretty decent hehe :)

i'm currently on a diet programme after weighting out myself to be 66kg omfg..from 60kg haha..had been eating non stop so need to start dieting and eating healthy food like fruits and the ever-disgusting-greenish-planish veggies +o( yucks. otherwise i will get constipation, wouldn't i? today came across an article on straits time..feel rather innudated by the actions of irresponsible owners. i meant when they have decided to buy animals such as domestic dog to their homes, its like you're their dad and love is all they need, isn't it easily done for such a simplistic animal for you to cuddle with? seriously, its a lifetime of commitment, and its sad to see an owner repeatedly thrown his dog at a wall till its dead..the cruelty is unacceptable and they should be punished as like they have kill human beings. fuck them! =(

think its time for me to force myself to get some sleep before the tiresome week ahead. :) goodnight. and love is such a wonderful thing on earth and we should really take some time to think before we act.

10:57 PM

I've been indulging myself with food..like really lots and lots of servings and i dun feel full at all. Whats wrong with me -__- I need to be on diet le starting from today! >.<

Hahaha..as u noe im now immerse in yog's mood so i feel like i am going to ord ! hahaha..so i planning to get myself lots of things..anyway the ord trip might cancelled because i feel like going to work..not yet confirmed tot..well yesterday went wif my sis and bro-in-law to the new hse..how do i say it hmm..the kitchen is exceptional big but living room is rather small..hahha..and i definitely think my room has shrink and summore without toilet le hoho!! but ok la got place for dogs to run ard and kinda cosy..hopefully it looks gd after renovation..one more thing is freaking de far ah! i need to get to know e north area well le..hahah..XD especially the nearest mac and 7elven XD

so my dad said to get me a queen sized bed!! WOO!! going ikea shop next week..hehe

aims:
queen size bed (by next week)
small table (by next week)
study table(maybe.)
bed side table(next week)
computer chair (maybe)
tv?(maybe)
cushion chair(next week)
slide wadrobe (next week)
macair(next mar or june during itshow)

:D

1:33 PM

The inaugural Youth Olympic Games opening ceremony has finally come to an end but i dun feel happy at all because it signifies the starts of closing rehearsals and going back army life (7 mnths to ord :P). I'm left with ATEC and 2 more ntm!! Soo near to ord yet so much more things to accomplished. It's like i do not have proper rest ever since i stepped into this scorpion's life. I really need a long break! After seeing the youth olympians yesterday, i realized how good it is to get to tour around the world FREE and make frens. i absolutely love sightseeing, i really wish to go on tour now, take lots of pics, taste the local foods, chat with the locals, shop, x) however, i dun think i can fulfiled my dreams..after ord probably going out to work to save up because army's pay is so meagre. T_T

anyway, yesterday night YOG was amazing :) it's like the best performance out of all the rehearsals (like duh), because i tot there might kok up!! hahah the fireworks was like SPASM. no wonder they way exceed the budget. the reflecting pool was like cool..i could see the audience reaction, it was way too cool. they were interactives and spirited. i wished i could be the one sitting there and not stuck at the gate, but i muz say i was pretty slacked :P hahaha cos most of the time im taking pics and vidz.

i went for a dental check up on tuesday and i was told to remove my right two wisdom tooth because its casuing my right jaw swelling as its growing outwards instead of upward. hope its fully subsidised and i really hate going dental, it sucks, but no choice. well..moving house soon to woodlands, feel kinda weird because hg has been my home for the past 20 years. Kinda reluctant but i will see how it goes ):

1:00 PM